I Should Be Sleeping Right Now, BUT...

Welp, here I am posting again on a school night. I should have been in bed a half-hour ago, but my spirit is vexed right now to say the least. I found out from my oldest half-sister that our uncle had an aneurysm Saturday and is in the hospital unresponsive. Our auntie had knee surgery and is in a rehab facility. The thing is I'd been promising both of them I'd call/visit since the summer. Follow-through isn't one of my strong points though, and that fact is beginning to take increasingly large bites of  my arse. I mean, suppose my uncle diea not knowing how much I loved him???? All I can do is take these situations to Jesus, and if you know the words of prayer please send up a few for my fam.

On top of THAT, I am really feeling the burn from being single right now. I've always been the victim of unrequited real life crushes, and even worse, celebrity crushes. It's the celebrity crush that's working on me right now. I have had too many famous "husbands in my head", lost so much time Google imaging them...Thoughts of this guy make me feel good, and our sex (in my head) is AWESOME.  Smh. When DOES one outgrow this? Oh, I know. WHEN THE LORD SEES FIT TO SEND A WORTHY PARTNER INTO ONE'S LIFE. Guess who's still waiting? THIS CHICK.

As I mentioned in my last post, blogging is contagious. I just saw a post from a blogger I follow--her posts are even fewer and further between than MINE. After reading it, I just had to come over here and cyber-scribble.  Of course with all that's going on and not going on, I'm at the keyboard like,

So all that you read above is why I'm still up, and a 5th grade class that I am expected to greet at 7:45am today is why I'm about to lay it down, almost an hour later than I'd planned.

Eh...Quick Post

*This post was actually written during the early morning hours of October 7. I'd popped a ZzzQuil though, so I zonked out before I could hit "publish".* 

I haven't written in over a month, but it seems like my last post was just yesterday. Eh, anyho...I do remember griping about not being ready to return to school as a substitute teacher. WELL, I did it. I've been subbing steadily since the beginning of September. Some days are still a struggle, not because I don't want to go to school. It's just because I've been without a routine for so long. Lounging is freakin' fun, ok?! I don't get a paycheck for doing that though.

Oh, and in other developments, I've decided that if I can't be a New York-based supermodel, I'll be a teacher. I'd like to teach either elementary school and maybe be a reading specialist or teach 8th grade English. (I've subbed at the middle school a few times and it's not as bad as I thought it would be. High school still gets a no from me. I mean, just hell no.) I'm hoping to take the teacher licensing exam next month so I can get a provisional licence (and subsequently a full-time teaching job) until I get in all the course work needed to be a "real teacher". It's an involved process, and I really haven't even begun. I feel confident enough to say now that I really do want to teach. This isn't just something that I'm saying because it's what people want to hear. Now I just need to get the proverbial ball rolling.

Funny thing. One of my cousins that I grew up with is a "real teacher", and she's working her way up to administration. When we were kids, she was the golden child. She was an achiever, and everyone just knew "Tiffany"--the alias she gets in this blog--would be a success in life. I always looked up to her and did everything she did, or tried to. Even now, I do sometimes go to her for advice...about professional stuff anyway. Since I've been on a termination marathon lately, she's been sending me job leads. After the double dose of hell that I went through with the Retail Toilet and the Retailtopia I KNOW that I canNOT do retail again. I'd be a fool if I did. I know it's not for me, and the good Lord--moving in that mysterious way of His--rescued me twice. And he sends little signs when I'm in a store and I fall into a mini-trance watching the employees doing retail...stuff. It makes me want to crawl out of my own skin. I'm scarred, man. So WHY Tiffany send me a job opening for a managerial position at PayLess Shoes?! GIRL, BYE. (She's still my go to for teaching advice though.)

So there. In my own rambling way, I've played catch up. I don't normally write on a "school night", probably why I didn't post last month. I've found that writing is contagious though. In this Facebook group I'm in, this guy asked us to follow his girlfriend's blog. I scoped it out; it's actually right here on Blogger. I'll have to peruse it further when I have more time. The first post I saw was about natural hair care products though. I don't give a guinea about natural hair care talk. I have my reasons. But just looking at her blog with the cutesy background and equally cutesy font made me miss the little homely, nearsighted, flat-footed child that is The Shellybird's Nest. I just had to swing by and love on it a little bit. Now that I've done that, I guess I need to lay these lanky 5'10" inches down for some shut eye. It's after 1am and I have to sub today.